some more scattered thoughts...

i am a true mumbaikar...n by dat i mean i spend a major portion of day commuting....n wat makes me a thorogh daughter of the soil is dat i use all d veins of this mega-city...to stretch from one place to another...i.e. the BEST (n truly the best!!)bus and the local trains....
in my daily happy adventures one thing that has consistently come to my notice it dat we mumbaikars are very accomodating....for instance...wen a bus comes to a stop...we all cling to the handle wid our might and throw ourselves upon the crowd...n then as the bus begins to roll out the unfortunate ones who cudn't get it...run along wid the bus....wat i have observed is dat while there r ppl already standing on the big toe alone at the edge of the door...but yet wen they see someone battling so hard..they fidget and make place and try to get the person in.......and to me it appears as some kind of exchange and understanding of the struggle...or maybe it is like sharing of frustration,,,,and that ironically becomes the worst part if the city....while we share frustration we indavertently encourage it also...we help because we have suffered....we ease the pain but somewhere we r unable to kill the cause...this largely symptomatic way of dealing with situation has permeated not only our way of living but also the thought process of the citizens...n dats why wen ders a bomb-blast of some calamity all of us unhesitantly help each other...but in doing so we salute our spirit which has already been killed....

some scattered thoughts....

sometimes i just stand on the edge of the terrace and try to hold the sky in my eyes...the evening sky dressed in sublime colours of beauty, purity and poignance....the setting sun on one side and the moon waiting at the door expecting a permission to enter...at this point...and this point alone...i think the sky gets to feel it's own indentity...just itself and all it's colours....not the holder of night neither the bearer of the day...just the sky....like any person would feel after he acquires his long-lost self, after he kills all the thoughts of abnegation and attachment, after he decides to quit being someone he is not intended to be....the sky stands thus...and in it's shelter stand the moon, the stars and the night...awaiting their turn....the sky picks them up....and lets them run over...to gather another day and another morning....

maybe that is the reason all of us love the evening sky....in it's emancipation (even though for a short while)...we see the purpose of our existence....

The Winds Flow

sometimes it has the face of peace
allaying all the parchment and distraught
and sometimes it just assumes a determined force
the one that destructs...and one that bellow
and the winds flow...the winds flow....

the winds flow
carrying the message; they know
Under the evening sun
on the autum leaves;
they tear their path
and ahead they go...
the winds flow...the winds flow...

the barrenness doesn't trouble them
and the colours don't fascinate them
the apostles of faith and grandness
they succumb to none; but they may bow
the winds flow...the winds flow...

the sea? they laugh on her face
and make noise to kill it's slumber
and over the waves they ride
into the night's glow
the winds flow...the winds flow...

the august winds
have the heart of a hero
a spirit of success
a sound of life
a breath of dream

they touch all; and change all
yet none know their fountainhead
and none know when they are dead
for on all mortals; just one knowledge they bestow....
the winds flow...the winds flow...




{P.S.: I do not know where to place this piece..for all i know this is not a poem..neither is it a text...bt i guess thoughts which have transparent understanding need not oblige any claasification...!!!}

The Happy Man’s Song

I went in search of a happy man’s cloak
Only to return empty-handed
I was upset; I was agonized;
So I decided to pull happiness towards me.

With this thought,
I sucked in the colours of the rainbows
The fragrance of the daffodils
And I swallowed the melody of birds
The greenery of the leaves
I pulled within myself the radiant sun, the quiescent moon
And took in me the happy spring

The mixture thus churned in me.
But…
But began to spread in my veins
Like the poison of the serpent
And so I swelled, and swelled and swelled
And bursted
And I died.

My soul was taken and placed at the feet of Divine Mother
But She forbade me ‘moksha’
My thirst was not quenched
My soul was still restless.

So I came back
In a new form

This time,
I seized in the infinite expanse of cosmos
The irreversibility of time
The triumphant waves of the ocean
And I pulled in the speed of the wind
And I grabbed in the forces that control nature

The mixture thus churned in me
But again spread like vermin
I swelled, and swelled and swelled
And bursetd
And I died.

Yet again I tried to take solace at Her feet
And yet again she sent me back.

This time I thought,
Lets’ take what I never took before
And so,
I borrowed the tears
I pulled in me the agonizing wails, the banishing howls
I took in me the dead, decayed, decomposed
I swallowed the dirt, disability and helplessness

And the mixture churned in me
And it began to flow through my veins
This time healing every part it touched
I started feeling as I never felt before
I swelled this time in eternal bliss
And swelled, and swelled, and swelled
And bursted
And I died.

Only this time to never return again.

Shadow of Night

The crows caw trying to awken darkness
The lake stands still afraid to break the moon's reflection
The owls search prey and bats screech
The artificial lights smuggle glory
The press prints unending story
The depressed are crying
The rest are dreaming

The world is loudly quiet
The dip of tap is limpid
The terror of the ghosts is placid
The burdened eyes hate dismal slumber
The stars dance to a windy number

The hollowness of space....a tireless charmer
The cumbered earth and her lonely harbour
The poet who knows not to write
The collocation of words...her only might

Is it the black...or absence of colour?
Or a blindsight that hardens at rear
She may not see but provides a sight
Yes there does exist...shadow of night!!

Leap

The last sigh,
Of an intricate mind.
The last sound,
Of a deaf voice.
The last breath,
Of a broken heart.
The last equation,
Of an alzeimered brain.
The last flight,
Of a tarnished wing.
The last touch,
Of a lepered hand.
All propel another realm
Of some things which begin
Where many others end.

खोज

बहुत दूर से चले आ रहे थे,

अब लगा की लौट जाए

पर जब पीछे मुड़कर देखा तो जाना

की आशियाने के लिए

हम जन्नत छोड़ आए...

बहुत कुछ पाने की तमन्नामे

हमने बहुत कुछ खो दिया

जो सपना पहले आखोंमे झिलमिलाता था

अब तेज़ रौशनी बनकर चुभने लगा

लगा जैसे सपने सच करने के लिए

हमने हकीकत से रिश्ता तोड़ दिया

जन्नत की तरफ़ चल रहे थे

न जाने कैसे जहन्नुम का रास्ता चुन लिया?

बस इतना-सा ख्वाब कहते,

इतना बड़ा कैसे हुआ?

और ये मन भी?...

एक पाने के बाद, दूसरा क्यों चाहने लगा?

आगे की चिंतामे

हमने कल को भुला दिया

सम्पूर्णता की खोज्मे

शून्यता को खो दिया......