home...one word that is truly synonymous to the concept of comfort and affection...and practically associated with a roof over your head...to me home is that place where you go even when the doors to all the places are closed...a place you can call ur own...! i always pitied the homeless and shelterless inmates of the Mumbai roads...i would sigh when i would see the BMC bull dozers rushing to demolish them...sometimes i would think it serves them right...illegal occupancy is a crime....in india, my home, i was legal...
now i am here...partly evicted from the place where i stay coz it is not on my name...i pay its' rent, electricity and pay for all its utilities...yet i cannot legally and officially stay...i see the owner's cart coming for checking...i see myself rushing and hiding things...picking myself and throwing out of the house...i stealthily sneak into the house every night..quietly place my footsteps and cook a silent meal..and then turn off lights into darkness and sleep ...rather try to sleep...but fear looms...anxiety is there...i have to get up early and practice the same rigmarole. i now understand what it means to be homeless...i now understand how pathetic is a life full of indignity...but i am not scared...because there is nothing to lose...dey will keep evicting and i will keep coming back...
the moment the BMC bull dozers went away, shanties were built back in the same place...i am trying hard but cannot stop thinking...how different am i from those slum dwellers...?
we were 6 people staying in 350sq.ft with just one bathroom and a sloppy fan, a gas stove, and lots and lots of pandemonium...but i would always want to go back to that place...here i stay in 530sq.ft, with centralised ac and inbuilt washer dryer, unlimited internet...but i cannot go back to this place...this is the difference between home and house...
i crave for a place where no fear looms....
